The Silencing of my Lamb.

The baby screamed, and I was tired.
Screaming, screaming, screaming.
The highest pitch; the most blood curdling wail.
"I'm coming" I hissed into the darkness, knowing she wouldn't hear me nor understand.
Opening her bedroom door, the screams did not falter.
"Shh, now. Shhhh" My pleading whisper fell away into the darkness as I lifted the writhing screaming bundle to my chest and held her close.

"Shh now. Sleep. Shh my little lamb."

Screaming, screaming, screaming - I rocked her back and forwards, holding her closer and closer. I felt her gasp for breath in between screaming and still I held her closer. Her face so close to my chest. Tight.
Muffling, stifling and then nothing.
There was silence at last. Silence from the screaming.

JK Rowling; The Saviour

God knows what I would have done throughout my childhood without the Harry Potter books to keep me sane, but for other people out there in the world these books were literally life saving reading material. 

Evanna Lynch, aged 11, battled Anorexia for 2+ years until she managed to gather the courage to write to her author-hero JK Rowling. The Irish actress, Evanna, wrote to Rowling to thank her for the magical wizarding world of Harry Potter that she could escape to; the books gave her "hope". 

Writing back "like a councellor" Rowling encouraged Evanna, through multiple letters to overcome her eating disorder with bravery and then to strive for the role of Luna Lovegood; the role Evanna is now famous for creating. Miss Lynch is noted to have looked up to Luna throughout reading the novels thus amplifying the significance if her finally landing the role. 

"Anorexia is destructive, not creative. The brave thing to do was not to succumb to it..." Lynch recalls from the resonating advice given by Joanna "Jo" Rowling. 

Evanna is now a survivor of Anorexia and has not returned to her disorder, she's pursuing her acting career and also working with the Harry Potter Alliance Charity where she gets to write and talk to young girls about body issues. 

Thank you, JK. 

Three for a girl, four for a boy...

So, I've been thinking about pregnancy a lot lately. Not in like a "Ooh, I'm feeling all maternal" way, but just in a pondering way. More like a "hmmm" than a "ooh" way. Gettit? 

70% of the girls in my college class are pregnant or have already had one child. Okay, that's clearly not an exact percentage because I'm not that mathematically motivated, but I'm pretty sure 70% is an accurate representation of what is going on. Okay, back to my original point; There's a lot of girls who're pregnant. And now a bunch of my adult friends are getting married and getting pregnant.

I don't need that for me now, I don't want that right now, I'm happy where I am but I can't help but ponder it all. 

The girls in my college class can't have planned their pregnancies, surely? They can't have wanted that for themselves at 18/19/20? They're Facebook's give a different idea though, so many announcements of "happy news" and news they have "waited so long to share..." Along with various photos of blurry bean-shaped things in a sea of black that is apparently what the pregnancy-savvy call Ultrasounds. 

I was talking to someone today who's bruised their coccyx doing God knows what, I offered them some painkillers as any friendly person would do. However, the person in question knows that I don't take paracetamol or ibuprofen, I take Cocodomol; just because I'm a wimp and I really don't like pain. She declined my offer, with "No thank you, I can only take paracetamol at the moment." Something clearly code for "I can't put strong pharmaceuticals in my body currently because I'm carrying an unborn foetus..."

Does pregnancy really put a lot of strain on what you can and can't do? 

Are there things apart from the obvious narcotics that you can't ingest? 

Am I wrong to believe that if you're pregnant you're meant to glow and be happy and glossy all the time? Is that not what pregnancy feels like, even if you look like the cautionary whale? 

Maybe I have more to learn than I thought.... 

Lex 

Winchester Tells Everyone...

To my horror, a student at Winchester University has created a Facebook page; "Winchester University Tell Him/Her"
This webpage allows you to send in tips and things you haven't got the guts to say in person, which are then posted anonymously on the Facebook page, for all to see.
Does that ring a bell? Set us on The Upper East Side and we've got our very own Gossip Girl.

This is a bad thing. Obviously. Whether the things posted are true or not, it's a degrading way of dealing with things that we are old enough to know how to cope with by now. I had more faith in my generation, that we wouldn't resort to some kind of Gossip Girl - Burn Book. It would seem I was wrong.

"Calling somebody else fat will not make you any thinner. Calling somebody stupid will not make you any smarter. And you've got to stop calling each other sluts and whores.It just makes it all right for guys to call you that."

 

Does that sound familiar? It should. It's from the world-famous movie Mean Girls. And I hate to side with cliche, but it's true. What's the point in standing up for ourselves constantly if everyone else believes it's okay to publically humiliate us and tear us down all the time?

Although not personally affected by the website, why am I the only person who feels this is a terrible idea?
I expected more of you Winchester.

Lex.

Winchester University SU Awards

Let me start by congratulating my housemate Demi Snape (@DemiSnape) on her award that she recieved yesterday; Fundraiser Of The Year for her work with Cure Leukaemia. Millie is Demi's cousin and is six; she was diagnosed with Leukaemia last year. Demi, being the family-girl that she is, took it upon herself to jump, freefall out of a plane with Go SkyDive. 10,000ft through the air, Demi made all her friends and her family so proud. Overall, Demi has raised just under £600, on JustGiving, towards her cousin's medical treatments as well as the same again for the Cure Leukaemia Charity.
Attending the ceremony with Demi just made us all more proud of our girl, not just for the fact that she smashed every target she set herself but also for the fact that she is being recognised for it. She desereved all the praise for what she's done both for Millie and Cure Leukaemia.
"I have loved being able to give some money to a wonderful cause,. A massive thank you goes out to Go Skydive for being absolutely incredible today and again thank you to you all for showing support for children with Cancer it means so much to me..." said Demi, on her Facebook page, on the day of her dive.

Demi is just one of my friends who are doing spectactular things on a daily basis, whether it's being promoted at work or being hired for the Entertainments, Communications and Welfare Officers through Winchester University's Student Run Elections.
As I sit on the sofa, moan about how I don't have the right flavour of Monster Energy Drink or how the next episode of Grey's Anatomy wont load on my computer I muse on all the things I could be doing, if I tried.
I want to try for things I really do, it's just the fear of failing that holds me back.
This all started last night at the Awards Show, my four friends socialising and networking with everyone, setting up meetings for the week about how to make our University a better place to be when I'm stood rocking back and forward on my Jeffery Campbell Spiked Lita's. I don't know anyone or anything...

Maybe it's time for that to change.
I'm going to try and find a pro-active hat to put on.
If I can find one in the mass of clothes, pizza boxes and Monster Energy/Stella Artois cans that is my bedroom floor.

Maybe I'll have an amazing story of my proactivity to tell you, next time.
Maybe.
Lex. X